Here we are on day five with two children, and I have to say it is starting to go much better. I can hardly believe it's only been five days; trust me when I say it feels like much longer!
We had a really good day yesterday. I would have to say that Matthew is not really all that thrilled with being a big brother. He is not mean to Nathan, but I think he is annoyed with him a lot and kind of perturbed that he's still here. Nathan is walking, and he is a busy, busy kid! Brad and I are tired out trying to keep up with him! This is a big change to us after having a mellow, quiet, calm child :)
Yesterday, though, there was about an hour and a half where both of the boys were playing with toys (near each other, if not with each other) and I felt a sense of relief to know that it is possible for both of them to be occupied and happy at the same time! We were able to clean up the house, unpack from our trip, and take a deep breath.
We have been trying really hard to make sure Matthew gets lots of one-on-one time still. He is clinging to Daddy at the moment, so Brad has been spending lots of time with him reading books, playing with his trains, and taking him to the store. This seems to be really helping, and hopefully is making him feel secure in his place in our family. It is such a big change for all of us!
Nathan has been much more relaxed the last couple of days and we have seen lots of smiles. He finally started taking a bottle from us which is wonderful. He is just a little peanut and we want to get as much nutrition into him as possible! At first he wouldn't even take a bottle from us (he is used to 2-3 a day) and then after a couple of days he would only take it sitting up and not looking at us. Yesterday morning I got his bottle ready, and he leaned right back in my arms and looked into my eyes! It may not seem like a big thing, but that is a big deal to me :) I think he is starting to trust us a little bit which is wonderful to see. Obviously it's going to be a long process.It is amazing to see my two boys together at last. It's strange, but it is just how I pictured it! I am not really bothered too much that they're not best buds yet. Knowing Matthew's personality, this is kind of what I expected and I think it's just going to take a while for him to warm up to the idea of having a brother. Hopefully by the time they're teenagers they'll be good friends!
They are both sleeping at the moment and the house is so quiet. It is wonderful to have a moment to sit and think! Having two is way more work than I thought it would be!!!! But it is good, too. The love I feel for Nathan is growing stronger every day and I know God is knitting our little family together.
11 comments:
Precious pictures! Can you tell how his hearing is? Matthew will warm up to him - it just takes time. Sounds like you all are doing great - even though I know it is so hard. Everyday will get better!
I'm so glad that you're having positive, happy moments in your days now. It sounds like it will just take time for all of you to adjust. I'll continue praying for you all. I'm here if you need anything at all.
The bottle thing is huge! For him to look in your eyes and accept a bottle - awesome!! Love the photos of the two boys together. It is such a huge change for all of you, and I always thought initially it was harder for the kids to adjust because the new sibling isn't a newborn but mobile and into the same toys! Where is Nathan sleeping? Glad he is sleeping well. Enjoy your Father's Day!
It sounds like things are starting to really come together, and it is definitely a process. And the bottle thing is huge. I have no doubt that everday, Nathan will form more and more trust for you. Thinking of you guys.
We are going through much of the same things around here. Going from 1-2 kids has thrown me for a loop!!! And honestly its really really hard. My heart breaks every day as I watch my little Jae-min try to figure this all out...the addition of a new little sister taking all of mommy's time.
Please email anytime you want to chat. I really really get what your feeling.
Glad things are steadying out a bit. And I'm sooooo happy about the bottle, it's such a special thing to do and sweet time together. Thanks for your sharing and honesty and letting us in! Take GOOD care.
Looking into your eyes during the bottle is HUGE! HUGE! YAY for that. A big step indeed.
Welcome to life with a busy, active, on-the-go (!!) kiddo. I don't know life any other way.
I'm glad the boys are playing near each other...it is just a matter of time. YAY for you husband to spend the time with Matthew to make sure he is OK during Nathan's entry into the family.
You two are doing a GREAT job. Hugs!
So happy that your able to breathe a little ~ great news about Nathan taking the bottle from you! :) Take care of yourselves and you are definitely in our thoughts :) **Hugs** He is so cute by the way :)
It is good that Brad is having some one on one time with Matthew, but it is also important to know that you have not abandoned him in favor of Nathan. Matthew needs you one on one too. Brad needs time alone with you too. It will all come eventually. Love the pictures.
I love the pictures of them together! and them in the tub!!! soo cute!
Rachel! I have been thinking about you and your boys ever since we met at DIA. How fun to read how it's been going. All good info for us newbies who are yet to meet our little guy. Glad to see everyone is doing great, and that you're being honest with the struggles. It's all very real, isn't it. Take care! Oh, and how do I send you my email address without the world seeing it too? I want to show you pics. Kellie
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