So. I've been absent for a while, busy with nothing much and yet feeling kind of scatterbrained. I have an adoption headache. Not a problem with our adoption, a headache caused by our adoption. Seriously, a constant headache. Apparently this is how my body handles any kind of stress - I clench my jaw at night, get tight shoulders, and have headaches every day. I had this trouble when we were adopting Matthew and in the end needed migraine medication. The headaches stopped literally the day after Matthew came home and I was off my medicine within two weeks of him joining our family :) I don't feel stressed about this adoption but apparently I am stressed - the pain started up right as we finished our home study. Running helps, the chiropractor helps, but mostly I'm struggling with what to do about it because I really wouldn't say I am stressed about the adoption right now. It is what it is, and I trust that the Lord will bring Nathan home to me in His time. Do I want Nathan home yesterday? For sure. Am I worried about it? Maybe on some level....while I'm asleep! Sigh.
We are supposed to get several inches (or possibly over a foot) of snow over the next few days. I am already feeling stuck and itch to get out of the house. Our moms group has already been canceled for tomorrow and the Bible study I go to on Wednesday isn't meeting this week, so...
Ideas??? What can I do for fun this week with my 2-year-old in my living room??? Help!
Speaking of my two-year-old...he's teething. Again. Still. He's getting his two-year-old molars and they are bugging him a lot. He has never been one to chew on a teething ring, but today...
When that wasn't in his mouth, his whole hand was. Poor little guy. But perhaps once these are in we can start sleeping again? Oh how we hope for that!
Running is going great - I ran 6 miles on Saturday! On a treadmill. By the end of it I kind of felt like I was trapped inside a bad dream. But I made it, and didn't have any knee pain! My race is on Saturday, if we aren't snowed in or if Brad isn't working (he works for a power company so if trees are down and power is out...he's at work).
Some days I just feel so bored with doing the same old things - laundry, picking up toys, dishes, more laundry...it is easy to feel like I'm not doing anything worthwhile with my time. Today I wallowed a little bit I was reminded of how much I have to be thankful for. Time with my little guy, time to teach him and read with him and make him laugh, a home that is warm and cozy that I get to take care of, a husband who I am so happy to see at the end of the day. And snow, more snow than I know what to do with...
Okay, well I'm struggling to be thankful for that right now!
But part of me just knows that a day will come when I will look back on this time of my life and I will wish to be back here, holding my boy who is still so little, listening to him learn new words like "el-phant" and "madillo" (that would be armadillo by the way). It's easy to let this time slip away, or to wish it away longing for the future, but truly I want to treasure each moment while it is here, enjoy it to the fullest, and make the most of each day God gives me.
Every day, even if its a snow day, is a gift!
4 comments:
Oh Rachel, it sounds like we are sharing some of the same "funk." Not sad and depressed, but just kind of listless. I'm so sorry about your headaches! What an awful way for stress to manifest itself. Did the meds help last time? Are you comfortable going back on them?
As for snow days, again I totally understand that itchy feeling. It sounds like the weather is not supposed to get too bad until tomorrow night, so we're planning to get out and hit the library's story time in the morning. After that, we're stuck! I'm thinking maybe a blanket fort in the living room? Noah's just gotten in to finger painting, so we will probably do some of that, too.
Take some deep breaths, play a game with Matthew and remember that all things happen in His timing (one of the HARDEST lessons for me to live!) I felt a little better after blogging this weekend, maybe that will help you, too. Keep us posted here! Once the weather clears up, we should get together again.
Will keep you guys in our prayers during your wait. Here's hoping you get some good news soon!
Oh wow! How well I can relate to your post! Daily headaches...not sure if they're adoption related but for at least a week.
Wanting to move forward in this adoption process. And today marks one week of no school (3 snow days last week, a weekend, 2 days off this week - not great weather this week to get out of the house either).
We have baked cookies (something I love to do with my kids - it's more work when they "help" but it keeps us busy and it's fun), had special lunch picnics, built a fort/tent and read books in it. We played a lot of board games - not as helpful with a 2 year old. Watched a bit of Dora/Mickey Mouse, put music on and had a dance party. Good luck!
Praying you can enjoy the next couple of days. I'm also trying to enjoy each day with the kids as a gift from God, because it is. I am not in a hurry for them to get bigger, even though I want this adoption process to move faster and bring our child home. Trying to enjoy each day as it comes. Hugs! You're not alone! Sorry for rambling!!! Sending up a prayer for you.
I'm not sure what state you are in, but I'm in MN, and ever since early December, we've been receiving multiple snow storms, and I know how it feels to be couped up inside all day, and feel a loss of purpose. There are times I'm feeling that very same way. Hope it gets better soon, and I Hope you get news soon on when you can bring Nathan home. :)
I just named MY POST RAMBLINGS! Too funny! Maybe we Green girls could make it down to play with Matthew tomorrow. (If you want us) Let me know.
I hope you get to do your race. Where is it? (text me)
I think I see the first few snowflakes falling!!!
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