New Challenges

We are so very thankful that our smiley little boy is back! Matthew has improved so much these last couple of days and has returned to his happy self :) He is back to playing, walking, and getting into things he shouldn't....and we are so glad to see this!

Yesterday was an interesting day as we found out some pretty big news that has the potential of changing our life in a very big way. The pharmacy called and said that Matthew's prescription wouldn't be ready until today. We have been practically living at the doctor's office and pharmacy this last week, so I wondered if there was a prescription I had forgotten about. When I asked about it, the lady said it was for an EpiPen Jr. I didn't know anything about this so I told her she probably had the wrong Matthew...but after checking the DOB and our address, she confirmed it was for him. Strange...

And then it hit me. Matthew had a blood test done last week to check for allergies when he had that crazy rash.

Oh boy.

I called the doctor and found out that he does indeed have several allergies. Apparently he is highly allergic to egg whites and peanuts, and less allergic to milk, soy, and dogs.

Wow, that was a lot to take in.

Yesterday I felt pretty overwhelmed by this news. I mean, what am I supposed to feed him?? I started looking at labels, which sent me to tears as I realized what a drastic change this will be for us. The fears rolled over me as I realized that there will be times when what he is fed will be out of my control...what if something happens to him? It was a day of processing and letting it sink in.

Matthew was up several times in the night (because on top of everything else, this poor boy is getting another tooth!) and every time I woke up, my first thought was, "My son has a bad peanut allergy". I don't know why, I guess it was on my mind a lot!

Today I am taking a deep breath, turning my fears over to the Lord, and starting the process of educating myself about what this means for our family. I am thankful to know about it, and hopefully now we can keep Matthew's asthma more under control as well. We see an allergy specialist next week and I am looking forward to getting more info.

So that's where we're at right now...a new adventure lies ahead!

When I Said I Wanted To Get Out of the House...This is NOT What I Meant!

What a crazy few days we have had! After finding out on Sunday that Matthew had pneumonia, he continued to get worse despite being on tons of medications that were supposed to help. On Monday we found out he has RSV, a virus that children can get that is made much worse by asthma (which Matthew has). He sounded terrible yesterday morning, and after a quick trip to our pediatrician, we were sent to the ER. It was quite a scary thing to hear how much he was struggling to breathe. At the ER he was given a breathing treatment and an IV (poor baby) and admitted for the night.

There had been talk of transferring him to a larger hospital about an hour away but he started to improve and so was able to stay here in town. We were so thankful to see him start to get better and perk up a little. He had been so lethargic and spacey, and we loved seeing the smile return to his face (even if it was just a little).

The rest of the day yesterday was spent doing breathing treatments

Taking naps (him, not us unfortunately!)

And reading books

We were so thankful to have friends and family who visited us and helped us get what we needed so that Brad and I could both stay with Matthew.

Nighttime was...rough. Matthew continued to breathe more easily, which was wonderful. The nurses were so kind and caring, but unfortunately (and fortunately I guess) they had to keep coming in to check on him and give him meds and breathing treatments. Matthew started out the evening in the crib...

..but after waking up and freaking out a little he spent the rest of the night sleeping on mommy and daddy in the extra bed in the room. We were so, so thankful that we had a room to ourselves. We couldn't imagine how hard it would have been if we'd had to try to get him to sleep with another family and sick child there.

Whoever wasn't holding Matthew at the time got to sleep on this very fancy and oh so uncomfortable fold out bed :) It turns out though at 4am you really will sleep anywhere!

This morning our pediatrician came to check on Matthew and found that he was doing so much better. We were seriously excited to hear that he was being discharged!

We are so glad the last couple of days are over at last. It was scary to see our little one in so much pain and discomfort. He is now on the mend and hopefully will be back to 100% in the next couple of weeks. We are praising the Lord for His help and comfort, and for answering the prayers of many people for this special little boy. We are so glad he is feeling better!

Sunday Update: How Do You Spell "Pneumonia"?

I haven't had much to blog about the last few days because we really haven't left the house or done anything! We have been hanging out at home and at the doctor's office, trying to get our poor little guy feeling better. It's been a rough week for him :( We haven't seen many smiles around here lately. I think this is a smile...but I'm not sure!

After coming down with this rash that left him looking just awful starting last Tuesday, he got progressively worse and today I ended up taking him to a Med Station kind of place to see a doctor because his breathing was labored and he was sounding so awful. Turns out he has pneumonia, not a bad case though thankfully. He is on 7 medications, and has had some blood work done to find out if it is an allergy or virus. We're also waiting to hear back if he has RSV (a type of virus I guess).

It is so hard to feel so helpless, and to not know what to do. I am so very thankful for my mom and mom-in-law who are always there to help me and support me...what would I do without them???

In the meantime, while Matthew is recovering, he's been doing a ton of this:

He is walking more and more (he's still pretty cautious and doesn't like to leave the couch without encouragement, but he's getting there!).

I just love this little boy so much and it has been hard to see him so miserable. I am hopeful that this week will be MUCH better and soon he will be back to his smiley self again.

Germs, Germs, Go Away!

I think at the last germ convention, a flyer was passed around with our address and Matthew's picture on it, along with the instructions, "Get him!" Our poor little boy has come down with yet another sickness, and this one has left him looking and feeling pretty miserable. He has had a rash for the last two days on his face, arms, and legs, and it only seems to be getting worse. We are heading back to the doctor this afternoon in hopes of getting some relief for him. I just feel so bad for him...

Daisie is doing her best to cheer him up...or maybe she's just trying to make sure he knows she's the Queen of the Castle...!

Hopefully our little man will soon be on the mend and these days of sickness will be OVER for a little while at least!!!!!!

Wordless Wednesday {14 Months}

The Middle of the Night

Even before he lets out a cry, I know it is coming. Something about the way he breathes or moves wakes me up, and I roll over waiting for that inevitable sound that stirs my heart in a way I have never experienced before. Even though for years, the sound of the dog whining has failed to rouse me to consciousness, the sound of my baby has a very strong power. And so I wait, and I listen.

He has different kinds of cries, and I learned pretty early on what some of them mean. He has an "I'm wet!" cry, he has an "I'm just rolling over but don't worry, I'll be asleep again in a minute!" cry, and then he has his "Oh mama I just need you right now!" cry. That one pierces my heart with such force that even though I love my sleep, I manage to stumble out of bed to draw him into my arms, offering comfort and words of love. I'm not sure what brings on this cry - could it be his teeth? or a nightmare? or is he still grieving? It is hard to know what causes it, but one thing is sure - he needs me, and it is my greatest joy to be able to take care of him and comfort him.

I thought the nighttime stuff would be hard, and truth be told, sometimes it is. So hard. Sometimes Brad comes out to the living room after Matthew has been crying and crying, and he finds that his wife is crying too! It is hard to be so tired, and to not be able to fix whatever is upsetting your baby.

But sometimes...sometimes holding my baby in the middle of the night is the most amazing and fulfilling thing I have ever done. Sometimes my heart leaps when I hear him wake up, because I get to see him again, if only for a few moments (usually I hope it is only for a few moments!).

I creep into his room, speak his name, rub his back and tell him that mama is here, and it will be okay, and I love him. And he lifts up his head, and reaches for me, and I hold him to my chest and whisper secrets to him about how precious he is. He wraps his little arms around my shoulders, sometimes patting me on the back as though he were comforting me, and slowly his cries ease and his tears stop. Sometimes he is ready to go back in his crib, but sometimes I'm not ready for him to go back just yet! So we snuggle in the chair, wrapped up in a blanket, and we rock and hold on to each other until his breathing changes and his body relaxes and I know that he is once again asleep. I stroke his hair, and breathe in deeply to smell the wonderful baby scents that are so strong at night. I think about how I used to long for this moment, and I thank God that the waiting is over and my sweet boy is in my arms at last.

I know these moments won't last forever, and one day he won't need me to hold him in the night. But for now he does, and I am so thankful to be the one holding him.

Even if it is the middle of the night!