A Work in Progress

I finally feel like we're making progress.

You know, in the forward direction.

After many sleepless nights we are starting to figure out what works for us. I have been reading sleep books, asking friends for advice, and mostly just praying for wisdom about how to help Matthew get to a place where he doesn't mind his bed.

What we've changed:

Nathan's crib is now in our bedroom. Sigh. Is it ideal? Definitely not. But for the moment it is what we need to do and we know it is a short-term solution while we work on Matthew's sleeping habits.

{An unexpected bonus of this - Nathan has started sleeping through the night!}

We now have an extended bedtime routine. We are doing all of the same things we used to do (bath, brush teeth, read stories etc.) but now we have a routine that we do the exact same way every night. We have slowed everything down so that Brad and I aren't running around chasing the two boys totally frazzled and just wanting them to be in bed NOW! We are deliberate and we talk about what is coming next, and this seems to help Matthew a lot.

{An unexpected bonus of this - Brad and I are way less stressed at this time of day and we are getting the boys in bed and asleep over an hour earlier than we used to!}

I made this handy dandy chart with pictures for Matthew to see and every evening we go through the steps and talk about what's next. He really loves it! Overkill? Totally! But we were so desperate I was willing to try anything!

We moved bedtime up to 7pm. Best thing ever. Before, it would be 9pm or 10pm before Matthew was actually asleep - and the whole time was a battle with screaming and him getting up out of his bed. He was so tired in the day that we just had one tantrum after another. Now he is asleep by 7:30pm or 8pm and he is so much happier in the day! And so am I! Our bedtime routine takes about an hour so we have to start that around 6pm, which is so early, but it is worth it to have some peace and quiet in the evenings and some sleep at night!

We started leaving his door open. We had tried this before but he wouldn't stay in his bed. Now he is old enough that we could explain that we were just out in the living room, and that we would leave his door open as long as he didn't get out of bed and didn't scream. He is falling asleep much more quickly and with no drama now.

My favorite one - Brad started going in to him in the middle of the night! I have always taken this role since Brad goes to work and drives most of the day and I really don't want him driving when he's exhausted. But for a little while we've decided that it's best for Brad to go since Matthew quiets down much more quickly for him (he is very reluctant to see me go at night). Matthew has gone from waking up 5-10 times a night to waking up 1-3 times, and he goes back to sleep so much more quickly now. Such a blessing!

I by no means think we have this all figured out, or that it won't get worse again. It just might - tomorrow! But I am thankful for a few nights of good sleep and I really think these changes will help us in the long run. Plus, this little boy is SO much happier!

And one day we will have our bedroom back.

You know, when we're retired and the kids have moved out :)